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Terry Beard Author 071518

Jul 13, 2018|

AN INTERVIEW WITH TERRY BEARD, AUTHOR OF THE BOOK SQUELCHED ABOUT HOW HE OVERCAME THE FEAR OF PUBLIC SPEAKING AND ADVICE ON HOW EVERYONE CAN OVERCOME THAT FEAR.

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Automatically Generated Transcript (may not be 100% accurate)

This is metro scope and intercom real world and public affairs program yeah I injury block some. On the show this time I would like to welcome teary Beers Terry is the author of the book squelched succeeding in business and life by finding your voice welcome to make scope Jerry how are you. I'm good thank you her record or. So. You are of Portland native and people might soon -- know your story they're gonna know all about cheese and tell me about teary bearden and your Portland connection. Might Portland can actually grew up actually in Vancouver Washington. And then after my military service in 6768. And want to pour out. I've been living near up leaving for going to college and universities samples those caught in a report on foot or fifty years. And they -- we might know your name right in the direction of beer frame shops and springs and or that's it. Think they've been around since 1974. In a few been in Portland for any length of time you know beard frame shops. Thank you for that and now you've written a book when did you when did you bugs get this book coming out. This book came out just about a year ago. In women working on it for a number of years. And developed a book. To share with my two sons. A bit about my history so I could leave a legacy of Rensselaer have a better understand you know themselves in the first place but I needed to start was. Signal look in my own life. Would you describe the look squelched disease self help book. No I would prefer self help book I would say that. He might motivate inspire other people to overcome. But it is how I get it it's not a preachy book I've been told him that not telling people how to do it but I just shared my story. And through the process of that. I've been reading about myself bombs so reviews online at Barnes & Noble and Amazon but initially wrote the book. From late to sign that they are mentioned just so they would better understand their father perhaps that would help them understand themselves. And then also ahead of your public speaking for the first fifty years. Of my life but I overcame the fear public speaking. Also will be out in the in the process of my learning how to speak on my feet my two sons a better able and are doing the same thing. Seems ministerial public speaking. Only about that. You didn't realize just how. Much I feared public speaking until I got into the business world when it started spirit train shops. And I was getting other people. To do might speaking for me. But going back into the second grade or in Vancouver Washington. I was the embassy. For each Brady's assembly for several weeks. We really felt good I was up there in front of a school assembly. From class. First grade through a great. But come along the way he mother superior told me that. You know Europe apartment on the recess in the playground. It is not only Ku already with good behavior credit and that we would want somebody lead you are so pleased so we're gonna ask you to. Sit down. You know they felt like there wasn't good enough and it was French. Emanuel that I heard all the time but it's good oh how much this was going to let me throughout the rest of my years in school. And they graduated barely made it through Oakland bay high school. But they had to take me in 1965. When I graduated from high school because we're. You know when the clerk junior college in a required course was speech. In a lake cook three. Speech of course as it was a requirement. And it was my turn to get up and give a speech when words just wouldn't come. In the future there's a professor at the junior college told me in front of rest or have. That there was a worse speech. He would ever hurt oh dear I withdrew school in the end I was drafting new US army. So a lot of people do have a fear of public speaking. That's a relatively common thing is net. Yes it is. You know I've studied this quite a bit in we have excuse me in America over 75%. Of the population. That fear of public speaking. And another ten to 15%. Brings us up near I 80% if not more. Was group of people that 50% if they have to live. They will do it but it's not openly look forward to doing. You're doing so only about five or 10% of us do not have a fear of public speaking. It's interesting when you do go to C a public speaker news you watch them and they have such confidence. And if I typing to myself well they if they seem super confident I couldn't stand up in front of this group of people and do what they're doing I really admire them. What do you think fuels people bureau of public speaking. Unprepared they have been felt like they're not good enough there's too many put downs and not enough put ups and our society. And people lose their self esteem they lose their self confidence then people are squelched. And when people don't feel good about themselves. They generally aren't very good public speakers. That's more than the title of your book comes from right squelched. Do you feel like what you were squelched should be in your youth. I don't little Coca squelched in my youth what does that older oh or think you about it and that's what are wrote the book restarted property. What. They've become in my life and moon excuse me and what I was doing. But yet but I have been squelched I have not been feeling good about myself so I overcame it by a going to deal Carnegie speaking seminars. And then soon after that. Twenty years ago someone invited me to toast last. Tell me about toast masters. How did you you know he's the player with those masters you're usually with a little bit yeah I know not super familiar little little bit. Yeah it's interesting that the organization that's over some B five years old. 400000. People in about a 150 to a 160. Countries. There's different groups as many clubs here in the Portland metropolitan area. Think between Seattle and northern California that about a hundred me I postmaster groups. Most those master groups meet for an hour to an hour and fifteen minutes 12 weeks. And in that process it's a support group of people who are all looking to become. Laura overcome the fear public speaking which is if you will go up phobia. And in the profit of overcome mean people are hopeful here people know one another become better better speaker. In an approach that the that we find their voices we developed community and connection and develop many new friends and lifelong friend. And in my case I'm gone on in the community. You know and we have the Portland Rotary Club three years ago. This all created the Portland rotary toast master group when we meet every Wednesday morning at seven feet. So did that I often hear about French toast masters to toast masters start in France. They're toast masters started near Los Angeles okay very. Yet but played gentlemen. Little over 75 I think it's closer to eighty years ago in Melbourne headquarters for toast masters is in Denver Colorado. And a lot can be learned in gleaned from going to host masters dot or work. So they were good kind of a oh what a large help for you right. But large cells and reunited with you in many weeks. I would go to two meetings a week to different clubs. This is club at the Arlington club that meets on Thursday morning. I was a member of that took Lester group. Force 1617. Years. In band up until about a year ago I was also attending not only that Thursday morning toast masters group but the Wednesday morning so little. So do you think you feel completely confident now. To get up in front of people and talk. Angel was absolutely right here. Open you know I think about. What Warren Buffett says the few warm up your value 50%. Learn how to do. Public speaking become a public speaker. Steve Jobs one of their greatest business people of all time was an absolutely fantastic public speaker. And the great public speakers are the best story. Years ago when you didn't have the confidence did you ever think you would get to this point in your life where you do have the confidence. No I knew that I wanted to gain the confidence because I'm always inspired motivated to see other people who have the capacity like you mentioned you know it's under. To listen to people they get up there and exit the compliments to deliver a message. And I never thought the that we get to this point but I am really glad that I'm here. At this place. Mean an accomplished speaker but I always have more or you know really enjoyed listening to other people gives great speeches than most great speeches around great story Colleen. We're talking today with Terry beard he's the author of the book squelched succeeding in business and life by finding your voice. To Terry can you share some tips on how old two over comments that any sort of speaking anxiety how do you overcome that. Well in my case there's a gentleman here in Portland Oregon. Whose name is doctor Richard live where he suggests that the that I joining the speaking group Dale Carnegie he suggested that. I wouldn't excuse me in any. Suggested that maybe I might wanna join host strips. And then when I joined to a masters I found someone literally took me by having him nude I was nervous knew that rep called purse or. And then I'm gonna help you along the way which you need to calm each and every week. And develop yourself the public speaker. And when they went to toast masters but found these people were all encouraging and the worst quarter supportive. And even though in the early period but was beaten by her speech. I found myself having more and more confidence to perhaps have read my speech. Then men to speak from the heart. And today rarely do I read my speeches at all but just. Just connect a certain part of a messy so I wanna get out. And I've been thinking about it but at least for people to start is perhaps the more they'll pick the sign to many of them. And I enjoyed mentoring people. So they too can become better and better speakers. What so what role does that educators and parents have to help. Younger children get the confidence that they can grow up with much more confidence and develop speaking skills and for the next generation. What is it my book. Do we know the three yard reading writing and and I'm suggesting that we have up for a are about rhetoric. Public speaking. I was recently needed was a retired school supervisor. And I think the person was quite surprised when it was pretty dogmatic. And very correct in suggesting. Why don't we offers these classes. You speak Latin. From grades one through twelve. It's been number one fear of America people would rather be in the coffin been given the eulogy. I think that they're commentary on our society. We do not learn how to communicate. We don't know how to public speed. And how are we into the lead organization can sort of therefore proper or not so. If we can't give up on her feet to share our vision in to persuade other people all. I'm finding my look my two sons both of them are public speakers money. Younger son graduated Berkeley a couple of years ago when he graduated and rhetoric. He. Got straight gates requisite stop was quiet at Berkeley and ask them how he could sit there and it so I picked up at the film. Is there whenever I was in the classroom in the process of raised there. At this story thinking and to respond to a question is that I just remember what I was toast masters. I need to give a one or two minute response and by giving up. And given a response. The professor recognize that my son was participating in class. You know when we last debate because some of peers buddies with certain class and my son was very it one reviewer doesn't rethinking and you know who will. So you had a couple of key along with its friends all beat king spoke with speakers in the English weapons that they district laughter. When they were required to get up and give a popular response to a question. That's really Google Talk about our support you yet it is this something we don't talk about in this society. But I myself orders celebration lives memorial services. Wedding receptions and people don't give up but I found myself a couple of times where are we might know somebody. But I feel sorry for the rest of the people. Who were not getting up to speed and also but the people that were to celebrate nobody's going to up them. And really celebrating but I make it at some nice comments for a couple of minutes to toast people over to talk about someone's wife. It's it's something we're not talking about our society and everything that we ensure. Utah and about public speaking what are the ways we can start that conversation. Well I mean in the campus schools supervisor. I have not heard back from the schools supervised so that I have lunch where this is now or higher this was acting marks. But including toast master club and schools. I think there's all kinds of different opportunities. Or we're speaking classes but they're not required classless. In another way we can improve public speaking is just having people feel better about themselves. Was such a competitive society everybody's been in our hurried to do better than the next person. That's part of our society but I think we're not talking about it I don't think it's been brought to many people's consciousness as well. We need to be good putting people are not putting people down. That is so true that's a seems especially true in kind of a hot button right now everybody's kind of in this strange bit of us against them discourse. Yeah absolutely and you were seen on CNN Fox News other. Television shows radio shows. People the way they're talking to one another week lost of civility in our society. It's well keep people in need and we may not doing it by design but perhaps what effect we're doing with my. I've just been fortunate that I've been around a group of people and toast masters where they've been supporting and encouraging. And I taken that out into bite my daily life whether or walking on the sidewalk around the office people. It's the words we use him to bring people in our push them off when there's nothing that's been the site of this war. They're overcoming the fear of public speaking because we do it we end up hearing more and more. Tell us some ways that you're encouraging when you're out in in the world. How do you do that. Yes. Well what I've gained confidence. When members and goes masters and stolen toast masters but it gave a lot of company. And in the process of doing that ups and sharing that with other people. And they reach out what other people all the time come Germany at those masters was no pressure to join but we're having a lot of fun. You might enjoy it. There's one gentleman and Talbott and McCleon cops Portland Oregon. I was a corpsman Rotary Club on the sixth of march and it was being interviewed. And they introduced from the mine clean and Cox and I congratulated him or bring in five or 600 members and the toast masters. And they told the audience that was. Quickly corrected he's brought him over a thousand people into toast masters over these last several years. Not telling people what to do with just sharing the benefits of toast masters what other people in this news gives people a new life. What you mean by boat anchor. Pardoning Bo what do you mean by door opener relationships. Well we go into cocktail party your business event. According to a Rotary Club meeting good because if the Indy organization and in good you are shown. Wherever it might be. But people feel good about themselves they reach out kicking into other people. Find conversation. It's a door opener. So Terry we talked a little bit about encouragement. And how do you encourage other people but how what happens if you run into somebody who's discouraging to you know what what's your reaction to them we've. Well I'd find a way to exit the conversations quickly as possible. There's no no question about that. And there's a need to drop out reason letting somebody know that's unacceptable. I have no problem but and have an issue with which somebody is not. Talking to each. In a way you're talking with more importantly in a way that's acceptable we don't have free will meet the the guided by the rules of civility. Keep the volume down what you hear the radio. You're talking a little bit earlier about how some of the best public speakers are good storytellers. How do you behold the skill storytelling so you can become a good public speaker yourself. Well it's interesting I don't know that it become a storyteller but I it was terrorist grant them. I don't have this gentleman but it is toast masters he said you know I don't like this which you speak but I don't know where you're going with mostly stuck to talk about what mature. Turn to speak what you always got something to say. In the form of this story. And I thought well it was a compliment but not really. But that's OK I happen to be in Paris France but there was ample store owner Bob book called hawk like. But I Carmen Seattle it's one of my favorite books some public speaking. And then nine effective ways. It's right on the front of the sub title of the common in great speaker number one your story tell. And when I have found through toast masters inside developed is still what I continue to own about storytelling. And one of the ways and it cracked this is the amount go onshore and out to dinner with people. I'm telling them the story and there's domestic units might be five or ten minutes. But in effect I'm practicing my speech from right next host messed. Urban. But if you describe developing confidence as an inside job what does that mean. Well I was just reading about this the other day. About one. What does that really mean and I've written about it and thank you treat him about it and look at the western combat use these types I don't we may never really stopped analyzed. You know what was that like grown about what was that like with their parents or custodial parent. Welcome to school we go to. Who were renters who put this who put his then I don't really understand. What's really the scope of our life. What has contributed to it what is distracted from it. I mean in the book I destroyed really kind of my memoir my autobiography. Coke. What life has been like for me and come to find out. It's everybody's story everybody has the story to tell and a lot of people have been put down a lot of people have felt not good enough. And in the process of almost put downs and distractions. From the lack of encouragement support. We've become shined actual term is lack complements what who lacks self esteem. And in the process of finding the right kind of people to beat wit and you were out. We get that support base we can really gained it immediate or was turning tricks. When I embarked on the trail of overcome in the career what looks beat you. We can all do it we just need to cope. And wanna help one another. Tell us what you've learned in some misconceptions about public speaking once you were able to do it and you have the confidence to do it what did you learn and and what can we learn that that may be it isn't so scary after all. Well it really isn't it here around the right people in all it says don't drink coffee don't current quieter who's the night wore dukes the do's and eat breathing exercise eat. Let you know. I'm not listening to any of that and a lot of people do. And the more we focus on that. But that means no. They're some people are do some new bands don't drink don't eat too much relaxed. When it really comes down to it it's just being with that are out or people. And knowing that topic that you're going to be talking about until the form of a story. But so often people get off. I'm not went all the what it used they don't get too. I think you're you're pulpit. I'm pence or don't have. So I was talking to the schools supervisor. And they said you know we're not really nice neighborhood here in sciele for a potential organized in rather. And I bet most of these young people here when public speaking skills. Well many of them are from most of them are not an accident we get five miles of any traction. Of this Tony neighborhood. I won't guarantee you 90% of the people we talked to last much they like to people speaking. We're gonna get over 90% of the public saying no don't do that don't wanna do that. He's done that so much now and asking people feel like they're the white toast master it is to enjoy it or what Oprah speaking I get all kinds of responses and react and how well the good public speaker not just by the way they. They've listened to my question at the you've got the confidence now. Yeah I've got the confidence and helping other people find their voices and for me it's it's. It's a community involvement it's it's a way I like to give back in the community. Doesn't pick a lot of committee meetings doesn't take a lot of money. It's just shown up when used with 715 as the foremost it was go to work anyway we take the time. To go there and being there. And other people speak really well too and some of us there. Quite more down the road if you will open some new people that are and the retreat of new people just says there's as if they have the skills that. And we are not part with people we don't criticize people with Tony we ordered retreat we give people creep back but. Somebody hadn't given that speech and there are no we don't need a column Grail though that they haven't gone as well as they could. We just want to get on their feet again and you go and keep doing it and when you feel the energy in the room that people want you to win start winning. That's great advice you've written a book called squelched succeeding in business and life by finding your voice heard good things have been a much scope today. An. Appearance. Metro scope is an Entercom radio Portland public affairs program. I'm Gary blocks and if you're involved with a non profit for the public affairs organization or if you have an idea for an upcoming show I'd like to hear from you. This is microscope PDX dot com and submit your ideas you can also go to the station's website and submit your information there. Thanks for listening to metals gold and enjoy the rest of your weekend.